The 7 Contrary Virtues stand in direct opposition to one of the 7 deadly sins, which were addressed in last week’s TMI Tuesday.
| Sin | Virtue |
| Lust (excessive sexual appetites) | Chastity (purity) |
| Gluttony (over-indulgence) | Temperance (self-restraint) |
| Greed (avarice) | Charity (generosity) |
| Soth (laziness/idleness) | Diligence (zeal/integrity/labor) |
| Wrath (anger) | Patience (composure) |
| Envy (jealousy) | Kindness (admiration) |
| Pride (vanity) | Humility (humbleness) |
1. CHASTITY – Not just moral wholesomeness but treating sexuality with due reverence and respect.
It’s too late for you horny people to be virgins, and I know you can’t practice chastity. So…if you had to cut back on one sex act, for 90 days, what would that be? BTW…How old were you when you lost your virginity?
If I had to cut back on one sex act, well, I could cut back on anything. I wouldn't want to, of course, but I have extreme faith in myself that I would be able to. BTW...I was 20 when I lost my virginity.
2. TEMPERANCE – Learn how to control sexual desires rather than fulfilling them.
I know many of you are wanking double time in honor of May Masturbation Month, what’s the longest you’ve gone without masturbating? Was it self-induced or did someone command you not to masturbate? Did you find it frustrating or liberating?
While I do very much enjoy masturbation, I generally do it purely for the fun/enjoyment/pleasure of it. I don't really do it because I think my body/mind needs to do it. I've probably gone years without masturbating. Mostly this was done as a commandment from church leaders. I don't think I found it particularly frustrating or liberating. It was just what you do (or rather don't do).
3. CHARITY – A willingness to give, freely and without request for commendation.
Have you ever had sex relations with someone just because you felt badly to turn them down or you felt sorry for them?
Oh, sure, I have. Plenty of times. Well, not the feeling-sorry-for-him part of the question, but the feeling-bad-about-turning-him-down part. I think sometimes it's part of being married. Give and take. Sometimes he has done this for me, too.
4. DILIGENCE – A zealous attitude and careful nature toward living and sharing.
Are you a diligent lover? Do you offer more than 10 minutes in the missionary (i.e., lazy lover)? What do you do that makes you a diligent lover?
I'd say I'm fairly diligent. It's pretty rare for us to do missionary position, so I guess I don't really offer more than 10 minutes. What makes me diligent? Hmm. I tend to be slightly selfish, but I do try to make sure that both our needs are met. If diligence is defined as a "zealous" attitude, then my enthusiasm should definitely score me some big points.
5. PATIENCE – Seeking appropriate resolution to conflicts, and on the ability to forgive and show mercy.
Your lover never seems to be in the mood for any kind of sexual activity. How patient are you? Do you:
a. Gingerly and sweetly try to talk to them about it and coax them into being in the mood.
b. Force yourself on them by making them feeling guilty about “denying” you so you get pity sex.
c. Go off and masturbate to satisfy your urges?
d. Hang your head low and hope tomorrow will be the day he/she is in the mood for nookie.
6. KINDNESS – Manifests as the unprejudiced, compassionate and charitable concern for others.
You are an enlightened sexual being full of sex positivity, confidence, and you love sex! Your motto is to “practice random acts of sexual kindness.” I’m curious what would your most prolific act of sexual kindness be? Why?
Last week, I put that deepthroating was one of my best and most boast-worthy sexual skills. I'm going to have to go with that for my most prolific act of sexual kindness as well. Why? Because it's relatively selfless. I mean, I do enjoy giving head and deepthroating, but ultimately, it's still much more for his pleasure.
7. HUMILITY – modest behavior, selflessness and the giving of respect.
When are you prone to modesty? In what ways do you look out for the interest of others doing things not from selfishness?
I'm generally pretty prone to modesty (in dress and speech) when I'm around my family. Unfortunately, I feel like I'm pretty selfish - especially when it comes to sex (which is what you readers are mostly interested in, right?) Of course, I do tend to make Jasper a pretty high priority in and out of the bedroom. I think I do a lot of selfless things for him when it comes to housework and schoolwork, and well, yeah, sexually as well.
Bonus: Your lover has made you mad but he/she is clueless and is making sexual advances. You:
a. Stay miffed or irritated at your lover and refuse to have sex
b. Rebuke your lover’s advances and tell him/her “not now because I am upset with you”
c. Set the anger aside and have great make up sex
d. Have selfish sex and do only what you want and take what you need with no regard for reciprocal satisfaction
